15 Weeks One Day!

15 Weeks One Day!

WOW!!!! I am so glad that the first trimester is over!!!!  Being nauseated all the time is terrible.  I would tell Dave that he should imagine having the stomach flu for weeks and weeks on end.  I am also happy to say that on most days I have my energy back.  My latest ailment is headaches, and I continue to get bloated quite often but that pails in comparison to how I felt in the first trimester.  

We are constantly working on our house and getting things fixed up the way we have always wanted them to be.  Dave has a long list of things he wants done and I joke that this is his way of nesting.  I on the other hand I have none of those feelings and often wonder if I am really cut out for this motherhood thing.  I am in it now with no choice, but often find myself worrying weather or not I will be a good mother.  I know people say this is normal and it will all work out fine, but I worry I might be different.  The main reasons I worry is that I am a slob, and don't like to cook, clean or do any other wifely, motherly duties.  I don't even take great care of my dog and I had countless fish and even a lizard die in my care as kid just because I didn't feel like giving him water everyday.  All joking aside, I guess we will just have to wait and see and I hope that I can rise to the occasion. 

I finally started to buy things for the baby.  I had been putting this off for some reason.  I don't know if it scared me because it made it so real or if it was a coping mechanism in case I lost the pregnancy.  So far I have bought a crib and a maternity pillow.  I have yet to buy any maternity clothing and am not sure when I will.  I am so cheap that I don't like to spend money on clothing anyway that the the thought of buying something just for a few months of use seams silly.  Luckily it is summer and I am still able to fit into all my regular clothes.  

I am just now starting to show.  I guess I have had a little baby bump for awhile but I didn't count it because to me I just looked like I needed to drop a few pounds.  Disclaimer: (THIS IS GOING TO SOUND TERRIBLE) I would often look at other women who were not pregnant and say heck they look more pregnant than I do so I am not counting my bump as a bump yet.  This week is different though, I definitely look a little pregnant and find myself holding my stomach all the time.  I don't mean to do it, it just happens.  

I have decided to keep track weekly of the things most people ask me about.

Weight: 111 (no change from pre-pregnancy --> not sure how this is possible but it is what the scale says)      -Although I did loose 4 pounds in the first trimester.

Clothing: Still wearing all my normal clothes.

Cravings: none (besides cantaloupe in the first trimester I really have not had any cravings)

Food aversions: still don't want anything to do with a hamburger and nothing sweet!

Overall: I feel pretty good, a little tired and moody at times but pretty good.  I am anxiously awaiting feeling the baby move.  

Things I hate about being pregnant:  Everyone telling me what I can and can't do.  I guess I am a bad pregnant person because I still eat lunch meant, and sushi, and soft cheeses.  For goodness sake we don't live in a third world country and I am selective about it.  Also everyone all the sudden feels like it is perfectly acceptable to comment on your size/shape/weight.  What is this all about!!  No, I don't want the hear, "you must feel better you can tell you have put some weight on," or "your looking a little chunky what are you eating."  

I still haven't taken a pregnancy picture but I will today, so look for it a bit later!! 

My First Thank You Card!

My First Thank You Card!

The other day at work I received this from a parent who I did the anesthesia for their child.  I used to HATE to do anesthesia for kids but have grown to love it and it felt so rewarding to get this in the mail.  It reminds me that sometimes just sending a thank you card to someone can really brighten there day! 

BIG NEWS!!!

BIG NEWS!!!

After graduation there were no jobs in Lexington, and Dave and I decided that it would be best if I took a job at St. E (where I had done most of my training) and we would move half way between Lexington and NKY so that we could live together again and both work, without to much of a drive.  We started working on getting our house ready to be sold, and looking for a place in Williamstown, Ky.  Fixing your house to sell, is awful.  Basically all the things you ever wanted to do to your home, you do so someone else can enjoy.  I found a small old farm house to rent and we quickly moved on it so that we could start moving our stuff in so that we could stage our current house better.  

About 2 weeks after we signed the lease St. Joe in Lexington called me and offered me an interview for a CRNA position they would be filling in June.  I decided to take the interview but really was happy at St. E and wasn't sure if I really wanted to switch jobs.  In the weeks leading up to the interview I found out that the house in Williamstown was infested with wolf spiders.  I quit staying there, and moved back in with my parent because I felt I was under attack!  Dave and I decided that it would be best if I got the job in Lexington and we could stay in our Lexington house, therefore all of our home improvement efforts were halted and we were just waiting to see if I got the job.  After the interview I was sold!  I wanted that job so bad!! On top of the fact that Maggie (one of my dearest friends that went through anesthesia school with me) worked there, the rest of the team just seamed delightful.  The other perk was that there was no call!!  I hate call and LOVED the idea of never having to work a call shift again..  The group interviewed 4 people and I was very happy with how my interview went, but was so nervous that I wouldn't get the job. 

With in days of the interview we found out that the Williamstown home was also infested with termites!  Giving us just another reason that we didn't want to stay there anymore.  And of course, just a few days after finding out there were termites, we found out we were pregnant.  Isn't this always how it goes?   Now, more than ever I needed to get this job, so that Dave and I could live together and we could stay in our house in Lexington which had plenty of room  for a family and except for the occasional bug was pretty insect free.  

The only other wrench in the plan is that I found out I was competing for this job with a friend of mine.  I knew she would be such a good asset to their team so I just hoped that they would make an exception and instead of hiring just one of us that they would hire us both. 

After weeks of waiting and waiting I got a phone call and learned that I got the job and they actually decided to hire two people, Cory being the other.  I was ecstatic!!!!   Everything was now falling into place.  Once I got my official contract I broke the news to the St E crew.  Despite the fact that the job in Lexington is just going to work so much better for our lives I am very sad to leave all the people at St. E that have taught me so much.

Now my only hurdle was to finish out my time at St. E and to tell St Joe that I was pregnant.  Yikes!!!

 

Baby's first Picture

Baby's first Picture

April 24th was a big day that I had been looking forward to since the end of March when I found out I was pregnant.  Because my cycles were so unpredictable we were slightly unsure of just how far along I was. My doctor thought it would be best to go ahead and due an ultrasound to accurately date the pregnancy. 

Dave took off work early, and luckily I got out early that day so we were both able to make it.  We even had time to grab a quick bite to eat at Applebees before the appointment.  I really should say that Dave grabbed a bite to eat because the smells in that restaurant were terrible and made me want to get sick.  I ordered broccoli and apple sauce, but unfortunately the broccoli had to much garlic and the applesauce was to sweat, so I didn't really eat anything.  

Once we were at the appointment I was so excited.  I was pretty certain that I was 8 weeks at this point and of course I had looked up all sorts of pictures of what an 8 week old baby looks like on ultrasound and was excited to get to see our baby.  When my name was finally called the lady ushered us back to the ultrasound room and put the probe on my belly.  I was confused because this is not how I was told the ultrasound would be done and I knew that transabdominally the picture would not be that good.  She quickly said "there is your baby and its heart rate is 186, which is to high."  She took some more measurements and checked the heart rate a minute later and said it was still to high.  She then told us that we were not 8 weeks but actually only 6. This was especially devastating to me because it meant even more weeks of feeling nauseated. She quickly printed us some pictures and then ushered us out the door. 

As we were walking out of the office I was overcome with a since of disappointment.  Everyone had told me how magical this moment would be and to be honest it just wasn't.  The picture didn't look like anything, we didn't even get to hear the heartbeat and on top of that I was told it was to high and there was nothing I could do about it.  Dave and I went back to my parents house and I desperately tried to find the heartbeat myself with a Doppler I came across ;).  Dave hung around for awhile but I couldn't find it and as the time went on I was getting more and more upset.  He just kept telling me that I should be happy that it had a heartbeat at all.  I know he was right, but at the time this just wasn't good enough.  About a half hour after he left I finally found the heartbeat and called him.  I was so happy to hear it that I called everyone, even my parents who were in Europe so they could hear it.  

The next day I asked one of the OBGYN's at work about the heartbeat being "to high." She said it was fine for as far along as I was and I shouldn't worry.  This made me feel so much better. 

Telling Dave's Mom

Telling Dave's Mom

Our original plan was to tell Peggy the day after my Families Easter Party but I was too sick to do anything.  Nothing sounded good to eat and nothing wanted to stay down.  We then decided to tell her at Olivia's birthday party a week and a half later.  It was so painfull to wait that long but we thought it would be the perfect time. 

The morning of the party Dave and I went to Toys R' Us and bought Olivia a purse and a baby doll.  Inside the purse was the same onesie that we used to tell my family.  Peggy's face was priceless when Olivia opened it, she looked so confused. We later found out that she thought we were so out of touch with reality since we got our 3 year old niece a onesie.  Once she read it, though she was so excited.  All though I am not sure who was more excited Peggy, or Emily since she was no longer sworn to secrecy.

Telling the Fam!

Telling the Fam!

We, or should I say I  decided to tell our families very early that we were pregnant.  I decided to do this for a few reasons.  One is that everyone I work with would soon be finding out because there are a few types of cases that you can not be a part of when you are pregnant due to fumes, excessive x-ray etc.  I didn't want all of the St. E hospital OR to find out before our families.  

We decided to tell my family over Easter weekend.  I devised this whole plan to tell them after an adult Easter Egg Hunt.  We assigned three teams to compete.  My parents were a team. My Aunt and Uncle were a  team, and my Cousin and her husband were a team.  My brother acted as the photographer of the event.  My grandparents watched out the window as the chaos began. Dave and I hid the eggs and the team that showed the overall highest enthusiasm as well as gathered the most eggs would win a giant surprise egg.  It was fun to watch all the adults run around looking for eggs, especially my Dad who insisted on looking in places we told him there were no eggs (he thought we were tricking him).  Ultimately the giant surprise egg was given to a non-participant,  my grandmother because she has been on bed rest due to a vertebral fracture.  Inside the Golden Egg held LOTS of confetti and a Onesie that said "Baby Kaiser Due Nov 21st."  Everyone was shocked!!!!  I think I threw them all off earlier that day when I ordered a glass of wine and just kinda carried it around with me for awhile.  It was such a relief to get the news out because I was feeling so lousy and nauseated.  I had spent the entire morning acting like I felt great when all I really wanted to do was puke.

More Pics from my brother to come, but here are a few that I took.....

Mom and Dad and there team hats!

My brother made my Aunt wear a GoPro

When You Least Expect It!!

Written on April 6th (my Birthday) 

One of my hesitations when thinking about starting CRNA school was that Dave and I would have to push back starting a family for a few more years.  Knowing that I would graduate 5 months before my 30th birthday I knew I would only have a few months if I wanted to get pregnant before my 30th.  I know that weather I got pregnant one month before I turned 30 or one month after would really make no difference but for someone reason this is how I wanted it to be.  So, after a few months of charting temperatures, and many other things I came to the realization on my own that I did not ovulate.  I finally got in to see a doctor on March 6th (one month before my 30th) and he confirmed what I thought.  The plan then became for me to start Clomid on my next cycle.  I was bummed because I knew a pregnancy before my 30th was now impossible, but I was happy to at least have a plan to move forward in this quest. 

The next few days and weeks ticked by and I waited and waited and waited for my cycle to start but it never did.  This wasn't to unusual for me so I didn't really worry about it.  I just figured this was God's plan and I should just keep waiting.

During this time Emily came down to stay with us so that she could run the bluegrass half marathon.  I was supposed to be running it with her but had gotten pretty lazy after school so I just provided her a place to sleep the night before.  When Emily got here, we went and picked up her number, and then went to dinner.  I was telling her about my pregnancy plans and as I was talking I realized that I was having some strange symptoms.  We went to Rite Aid after dinner and I bought a pregnancy test and two bottles of wine because I was certain it would be negative.  I mean I had lab test done that confirmed I did not ovulate, so there was no way I could be pregnant. 

We came home and her and I just hung out upstaires while Dave studied for his SE.  While we were watching TV I got up to use the restroom for the 100th time that day and took the test.  Immediatly it showed a positive result.  I just sat there in disbelief for a few seconds and then yelled for Emily to come.  She was so excited and it was special to share that moment with her.  I just kept saying"but I don't ovulate," and she would say, "apparently you do."

After she went to bed, I went down stairs to share the news with Dave.  I was nervous to tell him because as soon as I sat down next to him on the couch, he began to tell me how stressed he was about his exam, moving, drill, and work.  I just calmly told him that I really needed him to not be stressed for a few minutes, and then I spilled the news.  He had the same reaction I did, and just kept saying. "Here we go." 

There are many question marks in our life right now and by the time I actually post this, many of those question marks will have been answered, and I can only pray that we get the answer we are looking for.  All and all though we keep reminding ourselves that although you are never really ready to have a child, we are better off than many. 

According to the nurse at the MD office I am 7 weeks, however I believe this is one week off due to some labwork drawn when I saw the OBGYN on March 6th.  I have an ultrasound scheduled in a few weeks to acuratly date the pregnancy.  My due date is currently Nov 21st. 

I already have many symptoms, the worst one is N/V.  I am sick all day long.  The worst of it is one hour after I wake up and until around 3pm, but it never completely goes away.  I have been eating anything that sounds good, which  isn't much and forcing myself to eat.  Today I went and bought some pregnancy pops which are such a gimmick.  All they are is sugar and they do not help.  My next step is to try some ginger ale.  I have one in the freezer getting cold right now. =) 

On a funnier note, about two weeks ago I had an unbelievably strong craving for KFC.  I can not even remember the last time I ate KFC, but I had to have it that day.  I wanted it so bad that I looked up on my phone where there was one and drove there.  I ordered my food via the drive thru and pulled into the first parking spot I saw so that I could eat it.  Pregnancy related or just plane weird, I don't know!!! 

This weekend is Easter and I have a fun way that I am going to tell my family, so stay tuned for that post.